Learn how to grieve in a healthy way

This is how I grieve. It starts with a numbness and then a recognition that I'm avoiding something or there's a deadness in my life energy. And then it moves into shame, which is self-attack thoughts like I'm bad or I did something wrong or I'm not enough. And then that turns into a downward energy moving down from my head into my chest.

There's a heaviness to it. And then there's this sense of wanting to run or hide or flee and being small in the world is big. The sense of a self disappears into this pool of emptiness in my chest. And then that can become anger next.

So I fall down into the solar plexus area where the anger begins. And there's this building slow fire that goes from orange to red and then it begins to shoot up through the center of my body into my chest and then bursts out like a firework across my chest. It's warm and hot and angry. And then down my shoulders, into my arms and hands, the urge to make a fist, and then up into my chest, into my jaw, tightness, under my eyes, and then wrinkling of the brow, a tightness in the throat as if I want to yell.

And then that transforms into sadness. Sadness goes down again from the head, down into the chest, and then there's this tightness across the front of the chest, the intercostal muscles, and like a weight, something sitting on my chest. And then deeper into that, or beneath that, is the heart center, and that feels like this ball of pain and soreness. And then that ball keeps growing and growing, and the pressure inside the heart keeps building and building and building until that heart cracks open.

And then all of that liquid of the sadness spills out over the sides like a dense, viscous liquid, and it pours down the sides of the heart and into the lower abdomen. And that's when the false self dissolves into the emptiness and wholeness of our being. And then there's this quiet, vast stillness and silence. And then eventually, out of that comes this slow building of relief.

That is how I grieve. I recommend you also learn how to grieve in a healthy way and find your own natural path through the somatic landscape of your body. It will help you learn to love yourself, get to know yourself, and forgive yourself. Hi, I'm Scott, a spiritual teacher guiding people through spiritual awakening by embracing our humanness.