The 13 Patterns

What that almost always does is it causes rigid attachment, meaning you have the rules that you learn from your parents, right? And then those go into your unconscious mind. And then we're always using those rules to try to figure out how to navigate the world and how to predict the world and how to be in relationship. That's the blueprint, right?

So when we get older and we mature, we have the potential to differentiate. And when we say we're differentiating or actualizing, right, is another word, we're differing, we're differentiating, we're coming different from the rules that we learn from our parents, right? So we're recognizing those rules, deciding if they serve us, destroying them if they don't, and then making new rules. That's the process of differentiation.

That's a classic psychological process that I recommend everybody do. It's very important, but we're not really talking about that too much today.