It's the same thing over and over at every scale

It's the same thing over and over at every scale. I don't know, there's some Zen koan or whatever, and they always say, What's holding up the world? Have you heard that? And they say, Oh, it's a big turtle.

And then they say, What's the turtle on? They're like, Another turtle. And they're like, Well, what's under that turtle? And it's like, It's turtles all the way down.

That's how it is. It's it's literally with the model I'm working on, you know, I say it spirals all the way, spirals all the way down. The whole thing, it's the same thing over and over at every scale. So the addictive process is the same.

That addictive process is occurring in a relatively large scale in your body. There's emptiness, there's awareness, then you avoid and go to your head. Same thing happens in your head. You, you know, have a thought that's like, oh, I feel lonely.

That's just coming from the emptiness. You haven't escaped it yet. It's still there. It's just, you're not in your body anymore.

And then you go, you're not lonely. You have so many friends. I'm lonely. I have so many friends.

Oh, we just built tension, pain. I don't want to feel the tension or pain. Skip, right? And you just keep doing it until you get to a point you've done it like a thousand times, but you didn't know.

That's that feeling in your body where you feel like you're running and you're like looking and your intention gets more flighty and right. That's what's causing that. And then eventually you're like, fuck it, I'm doing the thing. And you feel better.

So that's why it doesn't work to catch it when you're at the end because it's literally like it's already happened like a thousand times.